All my life someone tried to steal her from me, how it felt anyway. Best friend since 2003.


Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate
and the Master so gently said, “Wait.”

“Wait? You say wait”, my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!”
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I’m claiming your Word.

My future and all to which I relate,
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I’m needing a ‘yes’ a ‘go-ahead’ sign.
Or even a ‘no’ to which I’ll resign.

You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
we need to but ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
I’m weary of asking! I need a reply.

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
as my Master replied again, “Wait.”
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God, “So I’m waiting… for what?”

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine…
and He tenderly said “I could give you a sign.”
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause the mountains to run.

I could give you all you seek and pleased you would be.
You’d have what you want, but you wouldn’t know Me.
You’d not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint.

You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there.
You’d not know the joy of resting in Me,
When darkness and silence are all you can see.

You’d never experience the fullness of love,
When the peace of my spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of my heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that’s beyond just getting what you ask,
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You’d never know should your pain quickly flee,
wait it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But oh, what a loss, if I lost what I’m doing in you.

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see,
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me…
and though oft My answers seem terribly late,
my most precious answer of all is still “WAIT.”

(Nancy Lee Demos)

Bordering Dangerline

I know I said that I'd try blog as much as I possibly could, but clearly that didn't work. I did want to, I felt like it.. But I just didn't feel the motivation for it. I guess that's good. I'd rather not spend any more time online than I already do (especially on my holidays) just to blog anywho. While I was in Townsville I went to church on the Sunday and I enjoyed it, although I expected a little more than under an hour of service. The preacher was from Sunshine Coast, and he really captured the church with his liveliness, and he talked about the four faces of Jesus and how He's absolutely everywhere, not simply just literally (is "literally" the right word to use?), but in our lifestyle, our culture and He is in the media. References on The Simpsons, South Park (usually used in blasphemy; oh how I detest South Park), musical lyrics (possibly the most intellectual words that have left Kanye West's mouth: "Jesus walks..."), fashion (Jesus is my homeboy, anyone?), and there's plenty more that I can't think of right this second. An annoying thing to me though is rosary beads. People use/wear them as a fashion statement, and I can assure you that the majority of those people aren't using it in a recognition to Jesus Christ. Wearing crucifixes around your necks/on your fingers (unless you SINCERELY are wearing it for the purpose of your faith).. Religion is not a fashion. Jesus, is not a religion; he is our saviour. He was crucified for our sins, so that we could be forgiven, to renew and cleanse our contaminated hearts. And we're making a joke out of it with, fashion. Idolatry is another problem. Putting anything (keyword: anything) above God, is worshipping it. When I was younger I would be obsessed with a celebrity or band, or tv show. To the point it's classified as idolising them/it. I didn't think anything of it, I was just a huge "fanatic" (what I thought anyway). Same with games, drugs, anything you feel you can't live without (sustenance being the exception), and if it's not our God, it's not worshipping Him, therefore it's practicing idolatry. It is unbelievably amazing what the power of prayer can do, yet when we desperately need it, we sometimes it's an option. Anyway, I'll bid you farewell now, end of my preach for the time being. In any circumstance, think WWJD.

So long!

I'm heading off to Townsville very shortly in the coming hours. I wish we had left earlier so we could possibly arrive before night time. I'm making it my goal to try and blog as much as possible while I'm away too, I'm not taking any digital cameras. Just my Diana and disposables, so I will be keen for the pictures to come out of those. Plus, I still have a roll of 120 film I'm yet to get developed, and I know a place in Townsville where I can get it developed, so I'll be able to see how they turn out too. Even though I didn't have a good customer service the last time I tried to go there, the lady was very unpleasant. Maybe she won't be there. Oh well. Anyway. I'm craving a fat-filled hot dog this morning, with onion, cheese, tomato sauce and mustard. Yummo. I think I may need to pay a visit to Donut King before we go or something. I'm gonna finish up this Toowoomba lamington now, we're almost ready to go. Blog soon. xx

International Women's Day

I wish I could suit this.
So I leave tomorrow to Townsville for 2 weeks. Visiting family, especially for my sick grandpa. I won't get into a downward spiral about it though, I don't like to broadcast private information on this public journal. All I ask is for your thoughts and prayers for him. Anyway, 2 weeks off will suck (financially) because I'm still working as a casual. So no holiday pay, no nothing. Hopefully I'll be able to be as frugal as much as I want to be! Wish me luck. My next few big purchases I want to invest in though, are: a new (good) guitar, so that I can properly learn it and get good at it. And the second is a good SLR. I absolutely love film. All my film photographs at the moment are just from disposable cameras, I do love them though, I go crazy for the sort haha. They just have a different, unique effect that I've always admired with their slightly blurred edges and vignette. These may have to wait until after my trip down to Melbourne in July (WHICH by the way, the flights are booked, next on the list is accommodation). I also really need to save save save if this Japan trip is definitely going through, I do really want to be able to make it for New Year's. Right now though, I'm drinking up the rest of my tea, dreading having to get ready for work in an hour. I don't mind it if I'm already all equipped with my work clothes and bathed and such, it's just the getting ready part that I don't like haha. Anyway, I hope you all are having a super week and enjoy what else is yet to happen, and let it be joyous and frivolous (frivolous, to an extent). xx

Spring Cleaning Your Soul

7 New Year's resolutions (for Christians). I know it's already 3rd month into the year, but it's still just as inspiring to live by day to day. (Source: click here)

Out with the old, in with the new! Here are seven things to get rid of in the new year:

1) Replace Pride with Humility.

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6)
He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. (Psalm 25:9)

2) Replace Anger with Self Control.

An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins. (Psalm 22:9)
The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)

3) Replace Unbelief with Faith.

See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. (Hebrews 3:12-13)
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16)

4) Replace Revenge with Forgiveness.

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord. (Romans 12:17-19)
Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. (1 Peter 3:9)

5) Replace Complaining with Praise.

Do everything without complaining or arguing. (Philippians 2:14)
Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased (Hebrews 13:15-16)

6) Replace Wicked Thoughts with Pure Thoughts

The things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’ For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.(Matthew 15:18-19)
Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8)

7) Replace Gossip with Encouragement.

Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down. (Proverbs 26:20)
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:29-32)